LMA Stalwart Ces Poole has escaped from the Blue Skies Retirement Village to get down to the club houes and kick those whipper snappers ar*es!!!

After being missing for 3 hours he was tracked down to the locker rooms at the club house where he had three young players cornered with his zimmer frame, telling them must try harder.

New coach Kornaszewski has said that even thogh the boys are reserves, the old fruit cake is right. We win this game, we will go a long way to win the division.

management would like to highlight that the sale of Fulvio Tinaglia was due to economic pressures, which if the club could afford to keep him we would have.

Fulvio has been a great team player since coming to the club many season ago, and we are sure he will do well in his future football career.

Recent signing have been done in an attempt to minimise the impact of the sale.

During yesterdays Cup game there was a large amount of tension in the club rooms. There is a strong rumor that coach Giersz was seconds away from signing a resignation form, when the sole goal came.

Many supporters wonder why he played so many second string players in such an important game.

Giersz has stated he has had some 'issues' lately, and may have been ripped at the time he formulated the team.

Ces Poole has returned from his world junket...tour to find some new players for LMA.
Unfortunately he was unable to regain the servives of past striker Neil Chang due to unrealistic expectations of Changs money grabbing manager.
However 3 new signings have been made.
A promising trainee from Hong Kong and 2 players from Poland to bolster LMA's defence.
Mr Poole refused to comment on his alledged visits to the red light areas of the countries he visited.

Reports that the LMA coach is on borrowed time, are as yet unsubstantiated. It is believed the teams stong showing in their first season in div V may have saved his skin.
On other news rumours about that the club is investigating the transfer of one of the founding players who has enjoyed good form in eurpoe.

LMA would like to deny all reports that the players, coaches and management did not take things too far over the previous week of celebrations.

Reports of gross drunken behavior are exaggerated.

However the club is believed to be negotiating a new sponsorship deal with Green Chartreuse. Vague details have come to light that the team may have drunk 10 pubs dry of the acquired taste.

LMA would also like to extend warm greeting to the other teams in V.202

Taz would like to thank you all for your competition and humorous support through out the season. In the end it came down to who was willing to go up. Thanks to you all, I will be thinking of the idyllic days of div vi.4 when I am getting my butt whooped :)

LMA's Polish coach Geirsz tore strips off young striker Moreno after the player received his 3rd yellow.

"It just no professional, I is expect more professional from player" he stated in bad English, after his team won it's 8th match in a row.

Concern around the club today is with the age & injury level of the remaining players, some hard decisions will need to be made before the next match.

Some pundits feel this announcement may just be gamesmanship, and maybe they are right :)

Two LMA players are extremely unhappy that the weekend’s game was forfeited and their opportunity to chase the golden shoe has been affected.

Tijmen and Cleber have both fallen down spots after the no show, and have asked club officials to investigate and actions that can be taken.

At this stage the club has not commented, but rumor is a significant cash bonus to the LMA player who tops the list are believed to be the underlying reason for the players outspokenness.

Coach Giersz has partied long into the night after coming up with his first major win since arriving.
G-Man, as he is now referred to, is pleased that his team prevailed & while it was said under the prior coach, strongly feels the LMA are on the up & up.
Rumors that the 49 year old coach was decked out in BLING doing a very bad imitation of 50cent have neither been confirmed or denied. Some truth has been established with Ces Poole referring to the Polish Coach as acting like a Right Drongo!