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Interview with Jon_Ayers, Winner of the Craig Wozniak Cup

Written by LarryPampushky

An interview with Long Shots specialist Jon_Ayers (482735), manager of Alie Land United (61022), who has just won the second edition of the Craig Wozniak Cup.

You joined Hattrick in July 2003. How did you hear about it?

I heard about it from myself mostly, having destroyed my first team after being reported and convicted for corrupt transfer activities, leading to a ban from Hattrick. After serving my time I returned to start my second team (under the watchful gaze of the HT moderation team, no doubt..). I originally started playing on the 08/11/2001, I think I saw the game on MPOGD or something like that.

After being knocked out of the English Cup in round 6 (511764859) (an unlucky result?) you were parachuted into the Craig Wozniak Cup. At that stage did you expect to reach the final?

This was partly down to a bit of rivalry, as I had previously niggled my round 6 opponent, with banter on the HT-Forums in the past. Matches are always more interesting when they mean something making them a bit more combative! It probably didn't help my cause that I'd also opted for a PIC which made the midfield more of a coin-flipping 50/50 affair... I was also well overdue a loss to a pressing team having never lost (in my memory) to pressing (the recommended nerfing tactic against a long shots team) since I started using LS...

Once I got over the disappointment of being knocked out of the cup (super early by my teams standards) and had scouted my opposition in the Wozza cup, I started to realise that I was one of four teams that could actually win it.

In the final (512715936) you played Newbottle Nasties (954003) from IV. What were your thoughts going into the match?
No disrespect to the nasties, but I was just relieved to have a comparatively easy cup final, as my semi (512601666) was against a much tougher opponent. Sometimes that's just how the draw pans out.

You made it to the cup final in season 49 (394498778), losing to an opponent who would probably have tested positive for steroids. In your eyes, how does that achievement rank with winning the Craig Wozniak Cup?

It's nice to have my name on a digital trophy, but with the improved crowd attendance in these cups this season, this cup run feels like winning division 3...

S49 was my best ever, my crowning glory (even if my team is stronger now). I had a bunch of world class/magnificent multi-skillers and I beat the likes of Prem Champions Phi's Fire whilst winning division IV on nothing but PIC's. I just didn't have the form, or the legs, or the pure mono-skill depth to win the final.

Your user name is the same as one of your players (112848081). Was he a special player for your team?

Sadly, I do not have supporter (can supporter people see my team announcements? [LP: No, sadly not.]) It's all very complicated, and involves my team history. Jon will one day become my team coach and he was my first (and the model) Long Shot Player. He actually was still scoring Long Shots when he was getting toward being a 40 y/o. I intend to replicate his glorious career across my entire current team, so that when it finally falls from grace I will only have a salary of 80k, a ridiculous stamina share and silly ratings for the salary level. Only then when they get injured beyond repair will they be shuffled off this electronic coil... Until then who knows.

Your team was one of the earliest, if not the first, to use the long shots tactic with what is now the ultimate defensive line-up. How did you come up with the idea?

The inspiration came from my RL team, Liverpool and that Champions League final. I was already playing 5:5:0 before it became a valid Hattrick Tactic, trying to make it work, so as soon as LS was announced, I knew my team's destiny.

Despite doing very well in the cup most seasons, your team has never been above III. Do you think it is harder for long shot teams to get promotion than 'normal' teams? (Looking at your league history, I could perhaps equally have asked 'is it harder for long shot teams to be relegated?'!)

This "lack of success" was entirely a management fault. I have focused exclusively upon trying to win the cup ever since around season 49, but without buying in any overpowered monsters to help me do it... Basically I've PIC'd the league games and only play league games more seriously if relegation is looming. I was number 2 on the English ladder for a while, I've beaten several Prem teams in cup matches, ladder matches or federation tournaments, so I'm pretty sure that had my attention instead been on the league during the last 8 seasons, that I would at least have managed to get near the top of a DIV.II at some point.

What would your advice be to a manager wanting to build a long shots team?

Have a lot of money, or a lot of patience. Don't underestimate speciality players as scoring goals is tough. Have a look at mokels team for a really good model setup. [LP: (506102) They will probably be Dutch champions before this is published.]

9. What skill(s) are you currently training and what stamina percentage are you currently using and why?

Defending, Goalkeeping, SetPieces, Playmaking. I mostly train to keep all my players topped up to combat skill drops. My stamina share bounces between 40 and 50%. Surprisingly, form hasn't suffered that much, and lining up with 33-35 year olds with excellent stamina can confuse some opposition who look at my player ages and then expect to be able to win the game in the last 30 minutes when my stamina declines.

I do not train players for profit, go look at my transfer history! I manage my team finances by winning matches.

You don’t currently pay for any Hattrick supporter package. What would the HTs have to do to lure you in?

Well, after I got married, we moved to Brazil... I applied to Hattrick to retain my English team citizenship. With the relative value of money here, the price of supporter is a complete joke that I cannot justify.

If your team had a song to run out to (maybe it does!), what would it be? And while we're on the subject of music, what album would you want on a desert island if you could only take one.

Wrecking Ball (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=My2FRPA3Gf8) I feel that teams who play me struggle to figure out how they are supposed to deal with a well set-up Long Shots team. If I had a pound for every time a team put out the biggest defence possible to stop me... Man I'd be able to afford supporter platinum!

For the Desert Island = a mix CD my wife made me, contents are a secret.

How many hours a week do you spend on Hattrick?

Hmm, this varies between 1 and 8 probably. It depends what needs doing, my team is pretty self sufficient.

When did you last kick a football?

3 weeks ago, after that I had a minor brain inflammation due to viral infection... All is good now, I will be back on pitches showcasing English Football to Brazil next week!

What's your favourite drink? And where would be the ideal place to drink it?

Chocolate Milkshake... anywhere warm.

Please tell us how/where you met your other half (or last conquest), and how he/she feels about your hattrick addiction?

We met in England when doing our masters degrees. She politely refers to this game as Hate-rick.

What was the last book you read? Was it any good?

Starwars: guide to being a bounty hunter... i'm afraid i can't divulge any of the content specifics to none guild members.

Your home has been invaded by killer bees. (Don’t panic! It hasn’t. Unless you can hear a loud buzzing. Then you might want to look for a can of insect repellent.) You decide to run and never go back. You can take one object with you. What would it be?

Only one object eh? Bag of dog food, the pets will follow... I'll assume my wife will also get out! living creatures are not objects -_-

What question should I have asked you that I haven't?

Favourite type of cheese would be a logical choice. What's the weather like where you are? Why are you so good looking and modest? Any of these would have done.

Extra question: What is your favourite cheese?

I'm a cheddar man. We can't get cheddar in the north of Brazil ( unless you buy American fake plastic cheddar) It's tragic. Mushrooms are like gold in scarcity value too....